does anyone ever really get used to being alone? there are billions of people on this world and some people believe that they're the only ones suffering. that's the pessimistic way of looking at life. i know some people aren't lucky enough to have parents and such but although it's hard to realize it, there are people in the world who care for them.
i tend to always go on emo trips on my own and i make the people who actually love me worry a lot. being single doesn't mean i'm alone, it just means i don't have a boyfriend.. haha. it's weird now when people ask me if i have a boyfriend, and i say no.. it's been what..? 2 months now? a large part of me has gotten used to being "alone" in the fact that i don't have a boyfriend i can run to now when i'm lonely. and i've gotten used to it. maybe in the end this will make me stronger? hmm.. i really wonder. i know that after every relationship i'm in, i mature a lot. i wonder sometimes why me and kevin haven't really ended it.. although we both say we're single we desperately cling to what we have left.. today i keep thinking if it's even worth it anymore. although i love him, are we really just too different to be together? i realize that i'm not even a part of his life anymore. &that realization hurts a lot.. i think he'll be okay if i was to just disappear.. idk.. yea, random babbling. sorry!
so as a way to get UN-emo, i'm shopping online.. ugh. i WANT this!!! if i bought this i'd take out the long messenger strap because that's just ugly. but i just got a juicy couture bag from my bestie so i don't NEED it. but since fall semester is starting soon i really want it :[ it's on my birthday wishlist<333
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